Of Course Nothing’s Wrong

passive aggressive trap 2

Passive Aggressive Trap

In the Passive Aggressive Trap we are feeling angry, but we have been taught not to express our anger; to express anger puts us at risk of being rejected or criticised.

To protect our self-imposed need for acceptance we manifest our repressed emotions through passive aggressive behaviours such as:

  • sullenness
  • stubbornness
  • giving the silent treatment
  • being sarcastic, rolling our eyes and saying ‘of course nothing’s wrong’.

What to do if you reach Passive Aggressive Trap?

Remember that this behaviour stems from a desire to please other people; a desire to avoid conflict and keep everyone happy.

It’s just that you have forgotten that you also have the right to express your own wants and needs. By making yourself a priority you can learn that you can get your needs met by openly expressing your feelings calmly and communicating clearly.

Being direct is less confusing and allows for a stimulating dialogue rather than frustrating disconnections.’

Susan Solomon, psychotherapist


Extracted from “Self Care isn’t Selfish